Sep 27, 2011
My Thoughts Always Seem to Tangle
It appears my brain works the same way. My thoughts are always tangled. Sleep should be a time of rest and rejuvenation, but I suffer from insomnia. When I do lie down for a few hours of sleep I wake up to muddled thinking. I place my feet on the floor; walk to the kitchen with blurry eyes, and wade through twenty different avenues my brain tries to walk.
I will try to give examples of this confusion, but even the attempt raises the internal argument as to how best to state it. So here goes. As soon as I open my bedroom door the cats are begging to be fed, I walk to turn off the security alarm and do a detour on the way back to check my e-mail. Complaining cats return my attention to their food. While feeding them, coffee pops into my brain. On the way to the coffee pot I wonder if I have any text messages. Coffee can in hand I search for my phone. In the midst of messages I remember the coffee. Pouring water into the coffee pot reminds me I have a challenge to write a haiku about water. I pick up the pen to scribble a line. Turning back to the coffee pot I realize I don't have a filter.... This is a tiny sample of my day. Perhaps it is ADHD or I am simply disorganized.
I spend my waking hours working through my tangle of thoughts. I have even taken a notepad to write down my itinerary for the day, a strategic, scribbled plan for organization. The plan works smoothly until I misplace my notepad. If my brain was the island where a group of survivors would have to see who could outwit, out play and out last, I imagine the players would be vying to be the first one voted off.