Sep 27, 2011

My Thoughts Always Seem to Tangle

Have you ever noticed the moment you take off your earphones and lay them down they become a tangled mess? It only seem to take a seconds to create a web you must work through to straighten out the next time you want to use them. It always frustrates me although it shouldn't. It would be easier to just untangle them without complaint, but there is that grumble that emits from me each time I pick them up.

It appears my brain works the same way. My thoughts are always tangled. Sleep should be a time of rest and rejuvenation, but I suffer from insomnia. When I do lie down for a few hours of sleep I wake up to muddled thinking. I place my feet on the floor; walk to the kitchen with blurry eyes, and wade through twenty different avenues my brain tries to walk.

I will try to give examples of this confusion, but even the attempt raises the internal argument as to how best to state it. So here goes. As soon as I open my bedroom door the cats are begging to be fed, I walk to turn off the security alarm and do a detour on the way back to check my e-mail. Complaining cats return my attention  to their food. While feeding them, coffee pops into my brain. On the way to the coffee pot I wonder if I have any text messages. Coffee can in hand I search for my phone. In the midst of messages I remember the coffee. Pouring water into the coffee pot reminds me I have a challenge to write a haiku about water. I pick up the pen to scribble a line. Turning back to the coffee pot I realize I don't have a filter....  This is a tiny sample of my day. Perhaps it is ADHD or I am simply disorganized.

I spend my waking hours working through my tangle of thoughts. I have even taken a notepad to write down my itinerary for the day, a strategic, scribbled plan for organization. The plan works smoothly until I misplace my notepad. If my brain was the island where a group of survivors would have to see who could outwit, out play and out last, I imagine the players would be vying to be the first one voted off.


3 comments:

  1. My thoughts get lost, distracted, confused the same way as yours whenever I try to leave a complimentary or constructive comment for such well written pieces as this. :)
    --the unknowngnome

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  2. it's all right dear...
    you are a poetess... you have wat some call the writer's trail (as opposed to the writers block)...

    there is always some side effect to a medicine...

    so while words can be a medicine to your expression.. they will be a side effect in that they'll pop in and out of your head and cause a little bit of confusion....

    i aint a psychologist to say that ;p lol!!! but.. wel... i think that's the reason...

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  3. Oh I so know how you feel about tangled, foggy thoughts. I started taking Vit B complex and Vit D which is helping.

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